I’ve had more than one hobby in my lifetime and I tend to do the same with them all: I find about something which seems interesting to me, I get into it, I get obsessed with it and eventually it gets so serious it starts to seem like a job.

This is what happened with my YouTube channel. When I first started on YouTube I had been watching videos for a couple of years and it seemed like a fun and easy thing to do. I could see other girls sharing their hauls in from their bedrooms and I thought I could do the same.

I soon realised that the videos were made with professional equipment, carefully edited and were recorded in sessions in order to provide regular content. 

I have never expected to become a famous youtuber but I’ve always been the sort to do things the best I can so I purchased a ring light, a better camera, professional editing software... I wasn’t sent the latest makeup releases so I spent tonnes of money on the latest collections as soon as they hit the counters. 

But that wasn’t enough, I had to plan what content I was to record and release it on scheduled days at a chosen time. I bought a planner and started filling the days. 

I record, edit and upload everything in two languages which is twice the work (I know, I’m bonkers!) so it meant I really had to work very hard.

Whenever I went on holiday for a week I had to record, edit and upload in advance, and as I was uploading two videos a week that meant preparing six or eight videos so I could go on holiday without worrying about my channel.

It all started to get a bit too much like a full time job. Not only did I have all that to do in the evenings (and many nights), I also had to keep my instagram and Facebook running, answer comments and interact with others “in order to grow”. 

I never watched TV or read a book anymore, any spare time was devoted to my YouTube channel. The problem is that I wasn’t getting much in return. Collaborations were only for larger youtubers, algorithms meant that I was getting fewer views and with an increasingly growing amount of youtubers it was impossible to get noticed.

What was once my hobby was becoming a very demanding unpaid job. I know how much work it takes to have my blog, YouTube channel and Instagram running smoothly but I haven’t got a team helping me or a salary  which would allow me to spend my time on this exclusively. 

Nowadays with my baby girl I have even less time and I’d rather spend it with her. Nevertheless I have quite an overactive mind and there are loads of things I want to share with you. I keep getting ideas for new videos or posts but then I never have the time to get them done.

But I haven’t given up as you can see! From time to time I have a free moment and I take some photos, a few days later I write a post while Astrid sleeps in my arms. Eventually a new blog post is born!

I don’t have a schedule anymore. I don’t have any sort of plans anymore. 

But whenever I can I deliver as much content as I can to my most loyal followers.

Thank you for reading my posts and watching my videos!